The Little Misshapen Teal Book
by Green Cricket
Summary: Another addition to The Little (Color) Book. This is Snipeshooter's. Make sure to check out the others in the series.
1. Journal 1 All About Me, Snipeshooter

The Little Misshapen Teal Book

by Cricket

Disclaimer: I don't own Newsies or Snipeshooter.

Chapter One- All About Me (For Once!)

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Well, Mrs. Green gave us this weird ass assignment to write in our journal's once a day, which makes no sense. What's it supposed to do, build character? Nah. Fights, now **those** build character. If ya' go into a fight with a big ego, it'll pop it like a balloon. That's what buildin' character is...I think.

But I'm supposed to write about me. Free write about **me**. Now that never happens. Its always about Jack or Davey or Mush or Spot or Les or Blink or even Pie Eater but never about Snipeshooter! Nah, Snipe ain't good enough for everyone else. I ain't appreciated. I'm just around for people to tease me and call me little. I ain't so little now, huh? Yeah, eat that! I got into your stupid high school English class 'cause I'm smart enough, so maybe you all would consider me an equal but no. I'm just a tagalong.

Phew...maybe I should stop...damn, I got twelve more minutes!

Fine. My name's Samuel Alexander Morris. Yeah, its a fancy name meaning that my parents left me on a street corner when I could barely say my name. A nice old lady, my "gram," took me in, fed me. I met up with the guys not long after. Where does the nickname come from, you ask? Its a **long** story, but I got eleven more minutes so I might as well write it down.

Since I was younger than all the guys, they convinced me that I needed to pass a test to see if I could be part of the group, which wasn't true. I was gullible, so I went along with it. Jack told me some cock and bull story about how I had to catch a Snipe, which is kinda like a mouse and kinda like a mole, but mostly like a badger. Its about a foot in length with a long tail like a mouse's but it has bigger teeth and really, really huge ass claws. I agreed. I mean, how hard could it be to find a huge rodent in New York?

Well, I took my sword and my slingshot with me and snuck into one of the sewers when no one was looking. It was the worse smelling place in the entire world! I never thought that anywhere could smell so bad! Yeah, it is shit but it was worse smelling than normal shit. If rats have such good smell, why do they stay in smelly sewers? Anyways, I kept my eyes out for the Snipe. Finally, I saw something so I whipped out my slingshot and hit it twice. It slowed down, so I chased it for what seemed like for forever. Finally, when I caught it, I smacked it with my sword until it stopped moving. They never did say I had to catch a live one...

So, I climbed out of the manhole and somehow ended up in Central Park, in the middle of the night. I found my way back, woke up Jack, and shoved the dead Snipe on his chest. He screamed like a little girl! I mean, it was like he'd never seen one before. Once he got over the dead animal, he admitted that there was no such thing as a Snipe and they used it as a ploy to shut me up. The thing I had brought back was just a huge ass rat. And so, I got named Snipeshooter. After that day, Jack wasn't too mean to me. Well, not as much as everybody else. I guess he's just afraid I'll stick another rat in his bed...

A/N I love Snipe. I just had to do it. Make sure you look at the others in the Little (Color) Book Series!


	2. Journal 2 Good and Bad Habits

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Chapter 2- Good and Bad Habits

Damn teach. Damn class. Damn school. I don't wanna sit an write about good and bad habits; I wanna kick Race's ass. He keeps being a huge ass jerk. Thinks he's so much better than everybody but nobody really likes him. They just use him cause sometimes the shit that comes otta his mouth is almost smart and witty. Only sometimes though. Most of the time its arrogant stuff. He's so self centered. Why do people care about him and nobody give a shit about me? All he does is accuse **me** of stuff. Like that cigar was mine! It was a total case of finders keepers and he had to be bitter. And Blink didn't have to butt it. I coulda taken him any day. I woulda taken him and kicked his sorry ass back to Italy.

For cryin' out loud, what the hell is a good habit? Well, if its kinda like a good thing about me, I'm just as smart as these bums in my class even though I'm three years younger. Um...I'm damn sexy. My gram says I'm special but I dunno what that means.

Mush keeps givin' Blink these funny looks. I bet they're plotting something against me, like they always are. I swear if they fill my locker with shaving creme again, I'll...

For bad habits, my psychiatrist says that I have anger issues which cause me to become paranoid, which is a load of bullshit. She says that one of these days, that if I don't lighten up, I'll crack and kill everybody around me. I thought it sounded fun at the time but I don't think I could do it. At least not to Mush. Out of the two, Blink is definitely the evil twin. Mush is just...Mush. Everybody loves Mush. Damn, I wish that was me. Maybe I'll ask him for a few pointers some times.

Wait...did Mush just blush? I hope he's not thinkin' 'bout the teach. She's kinda scary. (Yeah, I know you're reading this, so bite me.) I mean, why can't teachers be attractive? Then maybe I'd pay attention rather than ignoring everything she says.

Back to bad habits, I smoke...a lot. I mean, who doesn't? I like cigars better than cigarettes cause you can chew on them. Its just kinda a stress reliever. If gram let me smoke, then I don't think I'd be as pissed quite as often. Rather than chewing cigars, I have to chew pen caps. They don't taste nearly as good. I mean, who wants to chew plastic? I might as well go chew Blink's shoelaces.

Finally! No more writing for Snipe. At least not for today.


	3. Journal 3 My Dream of World Domination i...

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Chapter 3- Dream in 100 Words

My dream is easy. That I would get noticed! I'd be leader of this hell hole, not Jack. I'd sit in a huge ass throne with girls in skimpy outfits serving me booze and Havana cigars. Then all the guys would be bowing down, except for Mush. He's not a jackass. I'd be one of those strong leaders than can easily scare the shit otta people, like Spot, only not as angry. And I'd be smarter than Davey, only not a know-it-all geek. And people would idolize me like they do with Jack, only I'd be so much cooler. Racetrack would be all like, "Snipe, how can I be as cool as you?" And I'd look at him and say, "You can't."

Eh, it was a bit longer than 100 words but the extra was worth the effort. See, Mrs. Gangrene, I can put in an effort!

Shout outs!

Oh, I love you guys. I got fun reviews! Yay!

Buttons: Yeah, he does have a lot of pent up anger but that's cause people don't remember him often and he's just "the little shrimp." Tear Its what happens when people are mean. Especially to my poor little Snipey. I like his fancy name too.

Nakaia: :) Just you wait, there's loads more. I love Chapter 3. I think its my favorite.

Daydream: Yeah, we have that story too! I have a friend from Colorado who I worked with over the summer that had the same story, only it was a rat, like I have in the story. I liked the idea of a rat so much better than a bird. I mean, a bird wouldn't be as scary to wake up to as a huge rat. Plus, it'd probably be harder to catch a bird.

AngryPrincess: Hehe. I love him too. Can't you tell? I wish my little brother were more like Snipe and less like Davey on an ego trip...

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